Better New Yorker Captions

Click Here To View Cartoon #324

Then enjoy the captions:

Scott:
Good one. But, no, I haven't any wool.
Honestly, my mortgage feels like more of a curse.
When I started in this business there were more peaks.
Yeah, all my performance reviews contain the phrase 'ram tough'.
I've definitely had more than my share of harassment seminars.
After a while, I just got good at jumping from ledges.
I tell people it's Bluetooth.

Karl:
What, you don't think I can climb the corporate ladder?
My mission statement is 'climb every mountain'.

Brad:
-I have to keep this job to provide for the kids
-It's the new rage, no more shoe laces
-Metropolitan life can change a man
-One word, "stress"
-I decided to try gel rather than pomade.
-"One size fits all" hats are just to mock me.
-You don't wanna know what's in the briefcase...
-I have rubbed shoulders with some of the biggest bucks!

Kurt:
I know I really blew that pitch, but I just couldn't take my eyes off her wheatgrass.
I guess in a perfect world, I would go pro on my pan flute.
With this crackdown on immigration, I might have to self-deport back to mythology.
She says I'm just 'no faun.'
Everybody buts heads with their boss, but for me it's a homicide case.
I was just thinking of simpler times, back when I was a kid.
It's going to be hard to tell the boss that I ate my homework.
It's not the looks that bother me so much as the yodels.